technical style edit and justification memo 1

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You work in the claims department for The Acme Company. Your new supervisor Swizzle Malarkey has attempted to improve the professionalism within the company. In particular, Swizzle has asked employees to limit their personal calls during business hours as well as the number of personal conversations everyone has around the office. Unfortunately, your coworkers have not complied and office productivity is decreasing. Out of frustration, Swizzle drafts the below memo but asks you to review it before it’s sent to all employees. You recognize that the office atmosphere has become too relaxed, but you also believe that the style and tone of the memo could be improved for professionalism.

Instructions: You have two tasks:

  1. Edit the memo for style and tone. Paste your revised memo under the original so I can clearly see your suggested edits.
  2. Once you’ve edited the memo, write a brief memo to Swizzle (200–250 words) that summarizes your major editorial suggestions. Focus on justifying your 2–3 primary style improvements.
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