help essay revision please 2

/by

HI

hi sir.Thank you.

please help my essay revision sir.

need to correction arrange essay and need to logic and vocab choice. and structure…even context is bad…

If you add soemting please……Great thx/

^^* thank you. ( essay is too short need to more 300words…….addtion…i have no idea how to make reamain…even time is urgent….)

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